"Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated." -Confucious
Ever get everything you've ever wanted in your entire life suddenly dropped into your lap, all at the same time, only to take a long, hard look around and wonder what the heck you were thinking?
Yeah, I know. What a stupid thing to complain about.
Don't get me wrong, I am truly grateful. And excited. And shocked. And floating around in a "this is all too good to be true-waiting to either wake up or have the ground fall out from under me" haze. But I'm also exhausted, and overwhelmed, and sick, and terrified, and bewildered, and ready to throw my hands up and ask if it's too late to tuck tail and run from this vast barrage of new-found blessings--along with all the responsibility and expectations it entails.
Yup. Totally dumb.
I can't remember the last time I sat down and actually wrote a post. I can't so much as even remember the last Facebook status update I somehow managed to viciously type out on my smart phone in the few seconds I sat in the bathroom with a kid banging on the other side of the door waiting patiently for his bowl of cereal I promised him 20 minutes ago. (And for someone who is a social-media fanatic, that's saying quite a lot.) I kept waiting for the time, and the coherence, to say something eloquent and inspiring. And you know what I realized? Life isn't always eloquent and inspiring. In fact, those moment are preciously few and far between. Life is mostly filled with dirty dishes, and moving boxes, and mortgage payments, and insurance quotes, and mounds of laundry, and cover shoots, and conferences, and content edits, and launch dates, and phonics lessons, and over-due library books, and grocery trips (if you're lucky), and last-minute takeout (when you're not), and kids screaming at you through bathroom doors, and German Chocolate frozen custards snagged and claimed as lunch in the thirty minutes you have to get across town, and that extra 20 lbs you've managed to gain back thanks to the massive amount of stress eating you've done through it all.
In fact, looking back on it now, I should probably be grateful I remember the last time I took a shower.
At least, I think I remember...
So, anyway, here it is. My post. Much like my life at the moment, it's disconjointed and frazzled, but it's there. It starts at the beginning, in the middle there's some meat and purpose to it (I'm sure, though it's hard to see now), then it ends in a heap at the conclusion of the day, snoring and drooling on the pillow.
The important part is that, despite the insanity of it all, I'm also pretty sure it's totally worth it.
Why I Left the Church
The Importance of Friendship
Secrets to Staying Sane
Fighting the Rain